Hello SAM and the Backstage Community,

Just got done with the first phase of the Young Artist program at Opera Tampa (http://www.operatampa.org/about/apprentice.asp)... they recommended I start out in Musical Theater (as my voice is suited to it at my age, career-ready right now) and pursue Opera sometime in the future.

Please look over my cover letter (below) and, if you can, the attached resume (in JPEG format) and provide whatever criticism you deem appropriate

Thanks for your help.

---------------------------------

IAN O’BRIEN

15 XXXXXXX Way
XXXXXXXX, RI XXXXXX
(401) 555-5555
ianobrientenor@XXXXXX.com


November 30th, 2008

Mr. Agent Person
Agency Name Here
123 Memory Lane
New York, NY


Dear Mr. Agent,

I am writing to you on the recommendation of XXXXXXXX. I am a lyric tenor with a bright timbre, able to switch between classical and contemporary styles with ease. I also have strong on-stage communication skills.

I would very much like to setup a meeting with you sometime in the near future. I am excited to speak with you about theater singing and what recommendations you would have.

I look forward to your reply.

Warmly,

(SIGNATURE HERE)

Ian O’Brien

Ian_O'Brien_Resume.jpg (107 KB, 73 downloads) Ian O'Brien Resume (JPEG)

Who cares if you have strong on-stage communication skills? Take that sentence out. It's boring! You had me at being a lyric tenor capable of changing styles. The last sentence kills it.

For the second paragraph, just say:

I look forward to meeting with you soon!

There's no urgency to meet and maybe the agent doesn't want to hear you talk about theatre singing.

Yeah, 'strong on-stage communication skills' are pretty much part of the job description. That's like saying you're good at memorizing.

I concur that "I look forward to meeting with you soon" is better than your 2nd paragraph.

Your cover letter address implies you're sending it to New York agents. Are you in New York now? If so, tell them. Your resume sounds like you're in Rhode Island or Tampa. You could mention that you just moved to New York (if that's true... or are planning to soon) and that you just completed the Young Artist program at Opera Tampa. (You might mention that in the first paragraph instead of your strong on-stage communications skills.) Mention the "switch between classical and contemporary" before you mention the opera... or they'll peg you exclusively as an opera singer.

Closing with "Warmly" is sort of odd to me. But maybe that's your personality. There isn't really anything about your cover letter or resume that is very warm. Enthusiastic. Not really warm. (But don't write "Enthusiastically"!) I think you could just put "Sincerely". Or "Thank you".

The resume:
NIX "Build: Athletic". That doesn't belong on a resume. If you want to present yourself as someone who's athletic, maybe you could list some athletic skills in the "Skills" section.

You don't need to put the asterisks to denote "Singing Roles". Anyone who isn't a moron knows which of those credits are musical, especially since I hope you're sending the resume to agents that represent musical theatre actors. You really really don't need "Denotes Singing Role" after the "Concert" section. Hello. It's a concert. I can guess you were singing and not doing a drum solo. You're a singer.

You can put "Education and Training", but just "Training" would be fine. "Education" will be clear once they read the first credit under that heading. Are "Scene Studies" and "Opera Workshop" two different classes? If so, separate them. If not, get in an acting class so you can list some acting training instead of just singing training. Don't put any dates (particularly dates that are in 2010!)

Special Skills: It's understood that German is a dialect... you list it right after "Dialects". You don't need "(as English)" after it. I think "Sight-read" pretty much says it. I don't think you need the word "ability"-- it's already under the "Skills" section. "Ability" is a given. I also don't think you need to put "G clef".

And that's what I think. Good luck to you. Sounds like you have some excellent singing skills to offer.